of the night, I arrived at Becky's House Emergency Shelter with my three children, no money and nowhere to go. The staff was extremely welcoming and immediately began working with me on obtaining custody of my children, divorcing my husband and finding an apartment. Today, my children are healthy, happy and excelling in school. None of this would have been possible without the care and support of the Shelter staff - I am forever grateful. "

- Sheila V.

make Becky's House a great place for women and children to live. The staff here truly cares about helping you to overcome your problems and achieve your life-long dreams, and live without the fear of being abused. The other residents are also very supportive and always wiling to lend a helping hand. Everyone I have met here will always hold a special place in my heart."

- Evelyn T.

and we were evicted from our apartment. With no money and no family to turn to, we were forced to live in our car. We arrived at the Cortez Hill Family Center a short while later after a drunk driver hit and totaled my car. The Family Center's Staff and services gave us the second chance we needed to rebuild our lives. My daughter is going to college in the fall and my other children and I have an apartment we now call home. "

- Jennifer C.

A terrible divorce and poor investment decision left me homeless and unemployed. The PASSAGES program offered me the support I needed to obtain employment, establish a savings plan and achieve my dream of becoming a chef. With the help of the caring staff, I was able to complete culinary school and am now working as the head chef of a local nonprofit organization. "

- Tracy M.

in December 2005, she wasn't scared. He had pointed it at her before, but it had never been loaded. Kathy didn't think Mike would actually shoot her. The next thing she knew, she was on the floor with a round of birdshot in her head.

Thankfully, Kathy's injuries were light enough to get her released from the hospital the next day. The DA set her up in a motel, but Kathy saw how quickly that would deplete the small amount of relocation money given to her, so she went back home.

So conditioned had she become through her husband's mental abuse that her main concern was for him, not herself. He was nowhere to be found, but Kathy busied herself trying to locate him and take care of his needs. "My job in our relationship was to take care of him," she says.

Kathy stayed in her abusive relationship for 23 years. She lied to her friends and co-workers about her bruises, lied to the police when they came to the door. "Domestic violence is like a drug addiction," she says. "And I think it's the hardest to break. Because the good times - whether they last a week or a month - in your head, they far outweigh the bad." Kathy's ultimate goal was to keep the family together, and she endured the abuse to preserve her dream. "I came from a broken home, so I wanted my family together. I wanted to grow old with him. I had my picket fence, a gorgeous home." She would do anything to keep it all intact.

Mike's outbursts were unpredictable; any little thing could set him off. Kathy recalls him exploding when the kids beat him at horseshoes, or when he thought she was being too chatty with telemarketers on the phone. Kathy is a talkative person with a bold sense of humor, but Mike never approved of her socializing, or even working. "Mike didn't like me to work," she recalls. "When I had a job I enjoyed, soon I didn't have a job any more." Kathy says this is a classic aspect of domestic violence - isolating the victim from the outside world. When Mike's job required him to leave town for part of each week, Kathy was able to see friends and be social, and realized that people really liked her personality. "When Mike went away for work, people knew me as a different person. But when Thursday came, we shut the door."

In the weeks after the shooting, Kathy's situation deteriorated. "They say I was having a nervous breakdown," she says. She began drinking, and got arrested for an incident in a liquor store. That arrest, however, turned out to be a blessing in disguise. After one night in jail, Kathy got help from the Women's Resource Center in Oceanside, and later, got accepted to the Passages program at the YWCA of San Diego County.

Passages begins with 90 days of stabilization and group therapy. Kathy says that is "the best thing anyone can go through in life." She learned self-respect, boundaries, and communication skills. "Your bruises heal, but the emotional stuff keeps going," she explains. "When you're told you're worthless for so long, you believe it. I didn't think I could be working and paying my own rent. If it were not for the Y, I don't know where I would be." Passages also provides clients with the resources they need to become self sufficient, including legal services, education, career counseling, a bank account, and financial advice.

Approximately 100 women participate in the two-year program at a given time. Passages has an 85 percent success rate in finding employment and permanent housing for its clients. "Through Passages, you start over, from the bottom up," says Kathy.

Kathy is now consistently employed and paying her own rent and bills through the Y's Supported Independent Living program, which also requires its residents to save money from each paycheck. "They are there to help you every step of the way," she says. "If you need something, they will find the answer."

Kathy has also just finished training to become a victims' advocate, and plans to study further in this area. "I have so many resources now, and I've helped several ladies at the Y already," she says with a smile.

two boys ages 5 & 8, and one daughter, age 11. Augustine was college educated, and working in construction to provide for his children until the day he fell two stories from a building at a construction site he was working on. As a result of his fall, Augustine was rushed to the hospital where he underwent two major emergency surgeries. One surgery was performed in an attempt to save his feet, which the doctors feared they would have to amputate.

The second surgery happened days later when Augustine was rushed back to the emergency room due to severe gastrointestinal bleeding which he was having. When they opened Augustine up, they found massive amounts of internal bleeding, and in order to save Augustine's life, they had to remove his gall bladder, pancreas, and parts of his stomach and intestines. During this surgery, Augustine went into cardiac arrest and flat-lined. He was officially dead and began walking towards what he described as "the long tunnel with light at the end," until he was resuscitated and brought back to life again.

Following his surgeries and fight for life, Augustine returned home to the apartment he shared with his three young children. Due to his injuries, Augustine could no longer work. He had over $500,000 in medical bills when he left the hospital, and no longer any paychecks coming in. While Medi-Cal ended up assisting him with his medical bills, he began to run out of money to pay the rent. Augustine spoke with the landlord of his apartment complex and explained what had happened and why he was unable to pay the rent. His landlord allowed him to stay for awhile without paying, but eventually asked Augustine and his three children to move out. They did move out, leaving most of their furniture and belongings, and taking only a few bags of clothing and personal items with them.

With no place to go, Augustine and his three children moved into their car, a 1996 Geo Metro. They put all of their clothing into a storage unit and began showering at local places with public showers. Augustine returned to the storage each day to get new changes of clothing for his children. Augustine applied for Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI), which he was awarded. He began receiving $400 a month in food stamps which he used to feed his entire family.

Augustine's children had just finished their school year and were on summer vacation. So, Augustine found himself having to find free activities that his children could do every day. He took them to parks and let them run around and play, and he looked for other free events and places where he could take his children.

Augustine went to various organizations throughout San Diego County looking for assistance for his family. There was some room for his family to stay at a St. Vincent De Paul shelter, but Augustine worried about bringing his pre-teenage daughter into a shelter room that would be shared with numerous other people, including adult males. Augustine heard that the YWCA of San Diego County provided housing and other types of assistance for homeless families, including the Cortez Hill Family Center, a transitional housing facility for homeless families. Augustine applied for the program, was accepted, and his family moved into the Cortez Hill Family Center in June 2007. They are still living at Cortez Hill today, and Augustine has been able to save the money that he would have paid for rent for three months. He now has enough money for the deposit and two months rent at an apartment that he recently applied for. He is hoping that he will be accepted for the apartment and that he and his children will be able to move in beginning in October 2007.

Augustine noted that the YWCA of San Diego County's Cortez Hill Family Center is different than other housing programs for homeless people, because they provide more than just housing and food. The Cortez Hill Family Center and the staff who work there really try to "build you up" and are concerned about helping your body, mind and soul. They provide counseling services for his family, and they have connected Augustine with other resources that he to get his family back on their feet. Augustine shared that his experience at Cortez Hill has been amazing. He considers the Cortez Hill Family Center" his "Salvation" and knows that "God is watching out for him" during this challenging time in his life.

It is always a pleasure when a client makes contact with her Legal Advocate to let her know that she is doing well years after she first received assistance from the YWCA Legal Advocacy Program. Recently, just such a phone call occurred.

 The client first came to our program in 2002 seeking help with a restraining order and divorce. She was married to a man that had been physically and emotionally violent. Additionally, he was a citizen of another country and constantly threatened to kidnap their two year old daughter and remove her from the United States.

Much to her dismay, the judge only ordered a one year restraining order. The Legal Advocate then assisted her with the divorce. There were numerous hearings involved in her case, and Advocates for our office, as well as a law student/intern, accompanied our client to the hearings for support and clarification as to what was happening during the long complicated court process. The restraining order expired in 2003; however, our client was still terrified of her abuser. An attorney with our Program agreed to take this case to court and argue to have the restraining order extended. The attorney was successful and a three year order was issued protecting our client and her daughter. By the end of 2003 our client had obtained her divorce, and had a three year restraining order.

While working with her client, our Advocate ascertained that the client had a dream of finishing college. The advocate encouraged the client to pursue her dream and gave her some useful resources. Last month this client called her old advocate to share some very special news. This client graduated from college this spring, and is planning to go to law school to become an attorney and assist domestic violence victims. She thanked the advocate for all she had done, both legally and emotionally.